Oddly enough, people want to see more of the house. Soooo, here we go. There are lots of pictures; you can click on them to see bigger versions.
First, come down the street:
Then, walk towards the driveway, noting the tree-strewn front section:
Now stop to admire the "No Circulars" sign on the letterbox. Cherish this moment; the sign will soon be gone as we want circulars. How else will we know what to buy?
Peer shiftily up the driveway, noting the comparative lack of length and NO FUCKING MOWING STRIP:
Walk up the driveway, then turn left up the path just before the house itself. Watch those roses, they're killers (rippers of clothing, anyway):
Step yo' ass onto the spacious concrete . . . thing. Patio? Porch?
You see doors to your left and right. Open them both to let in the cold air:
Walk through the door on the left (the one with lots of glass), go to the back corner and have a look at the lounge. You will note that the pictures you tripped over on the way are not on the wall yet:
Glance up at the tasteful lamps:
Once you have recovered from this, have a look at the dining/kitchen through the big doorless doorway:
Step through the doorway, noting the gently searing light from the '80s-era halogens:
Have a closer look at the kitchen. Marvel at the way designers of old never let aesthetics get in the way of a good idea:
Turn around and holy shit, there's a pantry:
Turn back around 180 degrees and check out the all-gas stove:
Waste some time and gas looking at the pretty grill:
Turn back around (sorry) and check out the inside laundry to the left of the pantry. Hey look, it joins on to the bathroom, that's weird:
Oh no it doesn't - the toilet is in between:
[please post a caption for this in the Comments - the best one will go here]:
Behind you is the shower. Why yes, it is a three-speed with a bi-folding door:
Use the teleporter to go back to the porch thing, and go in the front door this time:
Walk in to the vestibule and look to your left at the . . . what is it?
Down the hallway, the first door on the left is a cupboard for storing gimps, punishing kids, etc. The second door goes to the bathroom.
The first door on the right is the spare room, crafted from finest yellow:
The door at the very end of the hall is the master bedroom. I'm the master, so that's where I sleep:
The last door on the left is Ella's room. She has a fantastic view out her window of . . .
. . . the garage. The doors are automatic, I haven't managed to smash one of them into the front of a car yet, but it can't be far off.
Wander towards the back of the garage and have a look at the inside:
Twist to your left and have a look at the little workshop at the back of the garage. At the end on the left there is a tiny little portable Korean dishwasher:
The garage has a side door, which I have neglected to photograph. Step out of it, turn right, and there's our pergola/archway:
Turn back around again and have another look at the house before you go: